


50 shades of Shapiro

by wrongdirection



Category: Republican party????
Genre: Cursed, Multi, Other, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-06
Updated: 2020-03-06
Packaged: 2021-02-19 02:10:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22970281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wrongdirection/pseuds/wrongdirection
Summary: Ben Shapiro DESTROYS your body with facts and logic
Relationships: Ben Shapiro/Reader
Comments: 17
Kudos: 38





	50 shades of Shapiro

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Trump](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trump/gifts).



> I hope you regret reading this as much as I regretted writing it.

"Going once, going twice, sold! To the eager youth in the back."

This was it. You had just placed the final bid for something priceless: a date with hot blooded Jewish conservative, Ben Shapiro. He waited for you ahead, smirking. As you went to claim your prize, all of the other bidders sneered jealously. You tried to focus on making your way to the podium without getting lost in his eyes. 

This was the moment you'd been waiting for. He was so much better in person. You prayed that he liked the looks of you as well. 

Ben smirked. 

"Well well well--"

 _"W_ _hat'cha say we ditch these liberals and get outta here?"_

He gestured toward his big, gas guzzling red Hummer with the the letters "MAGA" printed on it. You locked hands with him and left the dumb Democrats in the dust. Surely this was a dream and not reality. You could feel the wind in your hair. Woohoo! You shouted. 

"Like that? Then Hypothetically you might like me, and if that is the case I like you too, in which we are lovers. Correct me if I am wrong." 

You said nothing. There he went with his titillating debate skills. 

"As I suspected! So, if my hypothesis that you like me is correct, then.. come back to my place baby?" 

"Anything for you B-Ben Senpai! Let's make America great together." You s-stuttered, blushing. This was just like all of the anime you'd watched. You gave him a big smooch on the cheek.

Ben pulled the car off the side of the road and took you hand in his. He could no longer take it. He got down on one knee.

"Will you take my hand in marriage? I want to own SJWS with you for the rest of my life." 

Then in a moment of lust, he ripped off his clothes revealing the sensual body of 42 year old math teacher. His underwear had an American flag on it. On a right arm was a heart with an arrow that said "mommy" on his left was one for daddy. Of course across his chest was a tattoo of Donald J Trump's face. You'd never been more aroused. 

Of course since the two of you were proposed, both jesus and Donald J Trump wouldn't look down on you for the sin of unholy diddling. 

You gave consent (enthusiastic consent, of course), and he owned your body like it was a feminist with red hair.

To think this was only the beginning. Soon you'd be Mrs. shapiro. What a date. 


End file.
